Living Life on The Roller Coaster

A few days ago Courtney posted the following on her Facebook Page, “Some hours are good some are just plain awful!!!! Will all the hours ever be okay? I’m not so sure anymore. I think I have given up hope.” It broke my heart but lately that has sure seems like the pattern.

Ups and Downs

Living with Primary Immunodeficiency is a roller coaster. We are up because we have a clear arthritis diagnosis, then we are down because the best medication causes migraines. We stop the medication and the headaches go away, but the joint pain increases. The infections seem better this year, and then the flu raises its ugly head. Up and Down

For Courtney riding horses is her motivation. We were so excited to lease her a wonderful horse named Flicka. Then out of the blue, events caused Flicka to disappear from her life (without warning). She overcomes that and then we think we can maybe get Flicka back, then that falls through. Up and Down

The ups and downs of life occur for all of us. But a PIDD life should be monitored at such a micro level that the ups and downs are magnified and often more complicated and interconnected. Emotions have an effect on inflammation; repeated illness has an impact on emotions. Missed days of school result in homework late into the evening, late evenings result in a new round of sore throats. Repeated rounds of infections and missed school days result in frustration. The frustration of missing the important details of the school day as a teenager, the exhaustion of always feeling under par, the embarrassment of being the kid who misses school.  Depression can further weaken the immune system. Up and Down

As an adult it is hard to manage, it is overwhelming for a teenager contemplating taking this management on for a lifetime. When I think about all this, I am further impressed by the way my daughter gets up and gets on with her life. There are certainly days where the frustration overflows and the temper flares, but most of the time, she just continues on.

She finds joy in riding, in a Skype phone call with a good friend. She laughs with her friends and as she watches the Nanny. Courtney has always had a deep faith, that in the end, God has a plan for her. She just never gives up or quits, she just hangs on to the roller coaster. She is my hero.

The truth is that finasteride results at the moment is not exactly clear how propecia results can affect your judgment. You worry at the point.

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